Disastrum Session Report 1

25 Aug, 2024

Introduction

I'm playing in a game of Disastrum run by the illustrious [Sahh] and we get 100XP for each session report, so like a moth to a flame I sit down and write up a report.

Incolebantur ab persona

• Balthazar the Magnificent (Magic User, lvl. 1; played by Me!)
• Bree, the Without an Honorific (Fighter, lvl. 1; played by Lavi)
• Tristan, the Lowlife (Specialist, lvl. 1; played by Tristan)

The Events Preceding and Immediately Following the Attack of the Lovers

Balthazar the Magnificent (as I am often rightfully named in the New World) and his retinue made landfall in the colony of Jamestown on the 31st of March in the Year of Our Lord (truly, the only one who is above Balthazar the Magnificent) 1633. We arrived by ship after several months journey from England, with directions to make our way to the estate of Dr. John Trefutis. Truthfully, being a practitioner of the mystical arts, my means of employment was substantially different¹ than my compatriots, who were indentured to the Dr. by means of escaping some horrible fate in the Old World. Tristan, a man overtaken by the gambling urge, was my stalwart companion in the early days of the journey, as was a one Bree. Both of them were particularly deft in the art of war, and so I was put at ease early on in the trip that, should we be waylaid by the undesirable company of scoundrels, these two might serve as excellent means of distraction in my quick and dextrous exit from the vicinity.

As the land came into view after many months of water-laden horizons, the entire crew was taken aback. Sitting atop a mountain far into the West was a second sun. Bright and orange, it sent a shiver down my spine to watch one sun sit on the edge of the world while another loomed high overhead. What horrible mysteries does the New World hold?

In any case, we made landfall and made contact with an Indigenous man named Samuel, currently employed in the service of Dr. Trefutis, who informed us that the Doctor had set out for the falls of the James River a few days travel inland². We were to travel to his estate, the New Dunster Plantation, regroup with his other servants (of which I clearly ranked above) and then regroup with the good Doctor at the falls.

We arrived at New Dunster on the first day of April. Truth be told, I was expecting more... pageantry from the doctor. His estate and many of the surrounding farms were shoddily constructed and looked as though they were quickly assembled. Samuel explained to us during the trip that this construction was due to the roving nature of the tobacco farmers who, rather than rotating their crops seasonally, moved their plots whenever the soil stopped producing good tobacco. It was at the edge of this avaricious expansion that we assembled our crew and set out. Among us were:

• Balthazar, author of this testimony
• Samuel, serving as a guide
• Tristan, the aforementioned
• Bree, the aforementioned
• Rebecca Beacham, servant to Dr. Trefutis
• George and Andrew Griffits, brothers and pistoleers of considerable quality
• Matthew Halford, a large man wielding a wood Ax
• Richard Rees, and Christian Davis, both foragers by trade.

Leaving New Dunster on the 2nd of April, we made our way upriver for about a day in three large canoes before landing in a small bay. The mosquitoes and general humidity were quite unbearable, far worse than anything in England, such that by nightfall I was loathe to perform any duties around camp besides falling into a deep slumber. Because of my generosity, however, I did offer to join the second watch.

It was while Tristan, myself, Michael and George were performing this wwatch that four humanoid figures approached us, speaking in a language we could not understand (we would later come to learn it was the Powhatan language). We quickly awoke my advisor, Samuel, and he along with George, Tristan, and a recently awoken Bree all gathered their firearms and lowered them at the figures.

The humanoids, who up to this point did not speak any language Balthazar the Multilingual would know, began pleading and confessing their undying love to us after Tristan hailed them in English. All the while, they continued through the brush leading into our camp. As they made their way closer to the light, it was revealed that in addition to their mangled proportions, the legs beneath the knee were multi-hoofed deer legs, and floating above and beyond their corporeal head was an incorporeal version of the head.

Balthazar the Mastermind stepped forwards as they exited the clearing, drawing his spellbook open and spraying a colorful mist over them, which blinded the creatures and prevented them from tracking us. At this instant, the firearms we had lowered against the creatures were fired, felling 2 instantly and wounding another.

In the ensuing melee, Matthew Halford leapt atop one, cleaving it nearly in two with several quick blows to the forehead with his mighty axe. Feeling that its destruction was near, the final Lover was little more than a puddle as our company fell upon it. Before the final blow could be dealt, however, the beast disappeared beneath the feet of four of our group. It could not be found in any of our subsequent searches of the area and seems to have vanished from the face of Earth, entirely. If you were to ask the opinion of Balthazar the Mindful, this is naught but a boon to our company.

While searching through the nearby woods for the creature, Tristan happened upon a trail that led deeper into the woods from where we stood on the riverbank. We resolved to travel it at the beginning of the next day.

The rest of the night passed without incident and we awoke on the morning of April 3rd from nightmares of unrequited love.